I awoke in my tiny double room of the hospital and quickly gained a new roommate. But I wasn't paying much attention to what was transpiring on the other side of the curtain. I was being prepped for what would be a shocking event! No one had known the day before if I'd be in shape to have this procedure done or not. My INR had to come down drastically!
This had, in fact, been accomplished by multiple Vitamin K shots. My INR was at an acceptable level and now the object was to correct the out-of-whack rhythm of my heart. I had what is called Atrial
What I needed, you see, was a change of heart! An electrical zap! A Cardio-version!
Since I was fasting, there was no need to wait around for breakfast. I got trucked down to the zapping room early in the morning. I was nervous, of course. But, I had inquired about the use of sedation. When the answer was yes, I would have danced a jig if not for my complete physical inability to do so. (Well, and the fact that it would have taken quite a bit of nerve, and required no hesitancy to make a fool of myself). What was so pleasing, sedation takes care of a mountain of apprehension!
I was pulled from the gurney directly onto the zapping table. Plastic guards were inserted into my mouth to prevent me from biting my tongue (off). Yikes, I thought, thank goodness they had past experience to guide them in their preventative measures! The staff carefully explained what would happen while I was transported off to carefree abandon: They would first of all insert a camera down my throat and determine the absolute absence of any stray blood clots in my heart (which would sadly mess up their plans). Next, they would attach paddles to my chest and shock me with a strong electrical current. This action would so freak out my heart that it would straighten up, behave, and start beating in perfect time! (Er, strictly my own translation, Reader Dear).
"Here's the anesthesiologist now!" one of my nurses announced. I chatted a bit with the sedation guy as he inserted a needle into my arm, and then he warned me, "This may sting a little as it goes in."
Reader Dear, it was a monumental understatement!
Aaaargh! "Ahhh, ohhh, oh it's awful!" I exclaimed. "It's terrible, terrible! (moan, groan) AAAAAGGGGHHH!" (moan, groan). "I don't think I can sta....."