I'M CARRYING YOU back a few days, Reader Dear, to the wedding.
So here we are...
Have you had a chance to look around?
Did you happen to notice the Mother of the Groom?
What a dress she's wearing, eh?!! The very one in which I played a starring role!
I've waited almost a FULL YEAR to show you this garment!
Isn't it amazing?!
Look how this super-stitcher-mother-of-groom even sewed a little matching jacket...
You say you can't find her?!
You've looked around and she's not here?!
How can that be?! She's the MOG, for heaven's sake!
Uh, Dear Reader-but-NOT-Viewer...
...The Yard Man and I have decided that the hour is getting late, and we won't stay to watch the Sparkler Send-off of the Bride and Groom. There are plenty of younger guests who have not totally exhausted themselves with more dancing than they've done in the previous six months-or-possibly-many-more all rolled together. So we drive away, and I'm exclaiming about what a great wedding, and what a lovely couple, and what yummy champagne and cake. The whole way home the Yard Man and I are discussing details. Fifteen minutes later we're walking into the house, and I suddenly freeze...
"I FORGOT TO TAKE A PICTURE OF JUDY'S DRESS!" I wail.
"Really?" the Yard Man is incredulous. " All those pictures you took! She's gotta be on one of them!"
"Oh, I hope so!" I say. I've grabbed up my camera and am studying what I captured on film. There is not one photo of the Mother of the Groom. Not one!
"Let's drive right back over," I suggest hopefully. "It won't be too late." I look at the clock, and into my mind come wedding guests tossing out burnt-up sparklers. I shoo them away, and hope they're not heading for their cars.
"I'm going to bed!" declares The Yard Man. "Can't you get a picture later?"
Half-way back to the wedding spot, I'm moving along at a very nice clip. I overtake one of those white sedans that have a nifty blue light on top, and realize that speeding like this could be just the ticket to true "get-a-photo" nuttiness. I slow down.
This location where the wedding took place is situated along a dark country road.
Driving in the winding entrance, I see that the parking lot is still lit up. Ah, thank goodness! And I spy the mother of the bride carrying gifts. I hop from my car and call out, "Is Judy still here?"
"Yes, she is," responds Karen. "I think she's changing her clothes."
CHANGING HER CLOTHES?! I hurry into the building, trying to determine if the few folks roaming around are staff who are cleaning up or guests who have lingered. Then, lo and behold, here comes the bride!
"Wait, didn't you have a Sparkler Send-off ?!" I question.
"Yes, we did," she laughs. "But we came back."
"Ha! Me, too." I tell her. "We drove all the way home, but I came back to take a picture of your mother-in-law's dress! Do you know where she is?"
The bride points the way upstairs to the changing room. "If you hurry," she says, "she might still have it on."