Wednesday, April 4, 2012


I'M NOT A REAL COOK, Reader Dear, but I try to play one in real life. Today I bragged to The Yard Man, when I had dinner steaming and ready to eat, "A half hour from store to table!!" Now, considering that the trip from store to home is fifteen minutes (though it may have been only twelve minutes today, so heavy was my foot), I feel I truly outdid myself!

I was speeding home from the grocery store, schlepping those bags of food into the house and flinging chicken tenders into the frying pan so fast I think I was just a streak. I hardly had time for any photos. Then, once I had those fresh broccoli florets steamed and that mile-a-minute salad on the plates*, the skillet full of chicken and veggies was done to perfection, and I was so busy exclaiming over it and gobbling my dinner that...when next I thought of it, there was nothing there but empty plates! (The Yard Man, himself, pronounced it Very Good, [equaling two moans and an mmmmmm, this is simply to die for in my rating system!].)

Fast and Furious Flavorful Chicken:

About 2/3 of a 1-lb. Package of chicken tenders
(Or use the whole pound and add half again as much of everything else; or use the whole pound and add whatever vegetables you've got, in whatever quantity [though, if you're going to do that, well....harrumph, I know just what you're thinking!])

2 Tablespoons of olive oil
(preferably flavored)

1 Whole sweet onion, roughly (and speedily) chopped

3 Cloves of garlic (straight from a zip-lock bag in the freezer, already peeled--how handy!) put through a press

3/4 Cup of chopped red pepper
(also from the freezer, already chopped)

1 Teaspoon (or to taste) All-Seasons Salt
(I can hardly cook without the stuff, Reader Dear! Could never put on the cooking act that I do without it! One could likely substitute with salt, paprika, cane sugar, garlic, onion, celery seed, oregano, turmeric, and [yummy, yummy] silicon dioxide; but I should think it would behoove the would-be chef to buy a bottle of the already mixed-up ingredients. It certainly enhances one's odds of pulling off the "fast and furious" aspect of this dish!)

Several dashes of black pepper

Saute the chicken in the oil
for about five minutes
Flip tenders over, push to one side of skillet and
Add all remaining ingredients.
Cook, covered, for an additional ten minutes or so, gently stirring and rearranging everything every so often for even cooking

If you don't live more than fifteen minutes from the store, Reader Dear, (and are brave enough to [slightly] exceed the posted speed limit** [and have the good fortune of all green lights], and wish to give this fast and furious "recipe" a try, you just might be able to pull it off!) Bon apetit!

*For the complete experience, head home with a head of fresh broccoli and some salad greens all ready to go; wash, trim and put that green head of yours to steaming in a separate pan during the first five minutes of chicken-cooking (In spite of the fast pace, please try to keep the other one on your shoulders!) Arrange salad greens on plates and add some carrot slivers (be sure you've got a bag of baby pre-scrubbed carrots) and any other "salad fixin's" during the last ten minutes of chicken-cooking. Quick now--set the table!
**It's tasty, Dear Reader, but honestly NOT worth a speeding ticket;
so keep that in mind! I don't wish the "furious" part to know...


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