The Joy of Complaint

There is lovely weather today in my neck of the woods, Reader Dear (though I don't live in a woods, and I see nothing neck-like about this spot of land where my head rests itself each night).  I won't complain about odd figures of speech, however.  And I will definitely not complain about the weather.

But, ahem.

SINCE THIS WORLD-WIDE PANDEMIC IS DRAGGING ON FOR SO LONG,  I FEEL LIKE I'VE GOT TO COMPLAIN.  For starters, I am so starved for the old way of life :

All events illustrated below, with the exception of one,  took place less than six months ago.  So, the "Old Way of Life "to which I refer  is really not all that old.  It just seems that way*
*Saving that complaint for future use.

 1.  I AM YEARNING  FOR REAL OUTINGS!
     A. I miss going to Performances:

1. I miss Symphonies!

2. I miss Dance Performances!

3.  I miss Choirs!

4.  I miss Elementary School and/or Drum Concerts!

B. I miss Eating Out:

         1.  I miss eating out with friends!

           2. I miss eating out with  family!

            3. Heck, I even miss eating out with strangers!

C. Birthday parties....(alas)

To be Continued....

(I mean, I hope not...[you know, not the worldwide pandemic part  (I sincerely hope THAT part is NOT to be continued... [however, you know as well as I do that we've got little input on the matter])])

It's just my complaining that is likely to go on.

(And you, Reader Dear, if you prefer not to see my complaints, you have all the power in the world to hit "shut down" [do you not?).    Or--here's a bright idea--Keep on reading these moans and grievances, but make up a few for yourself, Dear One!  You could have yourself a grand old time muttering and griping and talking about the things you don't like and the things you miss.  It's The Joy of Complaint!

Sleepless in Seattle

One could likely name any city around the world and discover that sleeplessness is on the rise.  In this day (or, more appropriately, night) of stress and anxiety and paranoia, there are times when I lie awake and wish to be dreaming.  So here's a quasi-hopeful remedy I've learned to employ.

I begin with the letter "A" and think up a new line for every letter of the alphabet.  Study the list, Reader Dear.  I know  you're going to  quickly spot the pattern that leads me to (semi-peaceful) slumber (I've got to admit, luck is also involved).






Alice ate avocados in Asheville.
Betty bakes bread in Buffalo.
Carol cooks chocolate chip cookies in Cooperstown  (yes, yes, Dear Reader, I'm well aware that usually the term for  cookie-making  is "baking";  I give myself a lot of leeway when making my list).
Dorothy downs doughnuts in Denver.
Edna eats elderberries in Evergreen.
Franny favors fruit in Fort Eustis.
Grace gorges on grapes in Greenville.
Heidi helps herself to hefty helpings of ham in Houston.
Ilsa ingests ice cream in Indianapolis.
And on and on...

Do you get my drift?

Keep in mind there are so many ways to vary your list, Dear One, should you choose to concoct one yourself as you strive to drift off to sleep.

Augustina acts as an activist in Athens.
Babette begins to beguile in Barcelona.
Carolina changes course in Constantinople.
Diana designs her day in Dusseldorf
Ellianna enjoys entertaining in Edinburgh.
Francesca fancies frittering away time in Florence.
And on and on...

Several notes:
*I've learned it's easier to stick with "women's" names; there's far more variety. **
**In this somewhat conservative area in which I live, roughly every fifth man is named John [strictly my own statistic, pulled directly from my head (from whence the list, not to mention this very blog post, is springing).
***Give yourself a lot of leniency if you come to that wished-for swimming-off point around U-V-W. You really don't want to get to "X" without feeling that Xavier would be fine as a gender-neutral name.

***As a precaution, it's helpful to have new categories lined up just in case you should manage to eke out a list of 26 lines and still feel wide awake.  (Countries, cities, activities, species of animal or bird, to name a few).

*****

 Sweet dreams, Reader Dear!

**************************

****Hmm,  I've never tried "life-threatening ailments" as a category, Dear One.  If you wish to do so now,  however,  think how you've got one more choice than ever before (Camilla coughed and coughed with COVID-19 ) Yikes.  I don't recommend this category if you're looking to banish paranoia!

AARRRGGHHH

Reader Dear.  It's not a concern that the world (in my tiny corner of it) is cloudy and gray this morning.  It doesn't really matter that things inside the house have grown slightly dirty and disheveled.  In spite of such factors,  there are still many things about which to rejoice:

After all, look at this:   The HM and I continue to dine well! Yesterday I put on mask and gloves and set out for two different spots where food stuffs are being sold.  Now, we're reveling in FRESH FRUIT!  FRESH VEGETABLES! DAIRY ITEMS! MEAT!  CHOCOLATE!  (It goes without saying [though you'll notice I'm saying it anyway, Dear Reader] we get a constant supply of eggs from the HM's girls in the chicken coop!*

******
When I'm tired of rejoicing,
all I have to do is dwell on the fact that the entire Planet Earth is in the grip of a pandemic.

*******
I fear I'll never sing the "Happy Birthday" song again with such joyous goodwill.

*******
Perhaps I'll never reach out to shake the hand of a fellow human being again with such abandon.

*******
Will I ever linger in the aisles of a supermarket again, reading labels...560 mg. of sodium per serving?! Who cares--grab the can of soup and run! (another shopper is headed my way [and coughing!])?

*******



U.S. Postal mail from the black mail box with the red flag*...will I ever pull it from the black box again without pondering the (colorless) viral germs with which it's possibly infested?

********

AARRRGGHHH!
********

*(Ms. Black, the [black] chicken  [photograph above], believes it is her private box [though she seldom sees it])

**HM carries them to the kitchen door like the precious gifts that they are.
I accept them as such.


...(to be continued)***...

***If all goes well, Reader Dear, if all goes well...

It's Very Possible I've Died

It's been nearly a full half-year, Reader Dear, since you last heard from me.  (Begging of you, may I still address you as R.D. [occasionally Dear One, at the very least?*)

Yes, it was very close to six months ago that I assured you I had not died.  In the ensuing months I tried most fearsomely to post to the blog.  I wanted to offer some kind of proof of my claim.  I wanted to share with you something vaguely interesting [if not downright curious, exciting, hilarious, charming, fascinating, perhaps even puzzling or a smidgeon boring).

There were birthdays, involving parties (remember such things?)
Then, too, Thanksgiving came and went, with its gatherings.
There were trips here and there with the HM (Husband of Mine, I remind you).
Arriving soon after the day of thanks was Christmas (the celebration of which, thus far in history, has always followed closely).

There were lots of pleasing concerts I attended.
I wished to show you animal antics (I hasten to remind you that HM is aka Horse Man, and cares for perhaps a dozen other creatures, some more entertaining than others)
In six months' time, the tenants who dwell in my small apartment complex have not failed to provide me with much to advance my study of human behavior (details of which I've been known to tirelessly share with you in previous posts, my Dear Reader Dear, if you'll recall).

Ergo, Now! I've said to myself on so many occasions during the six months most recently categorized as History.

Now!  It's time to post to my blog! 
I've said it so often.
*******

Finally, about two months ago, I trotted over to the Apple Store.  It existed at the local mall (one of those long-ago places of commerce, Reader Dear).  I complained to the young man who met me at the door.  "I can't seem to upload my photos since I got this new laptop!"  

It seemed inadvisable and pointless to tell of the demise of my previous laptop (Spilled coffee, I confess).  I simply explained that what seemed easily done on the previous laptop appeared virtually impossible with this one!

"We'll be happy to sign you up for a class!" I was told,  "Happy to teach you all you need to know about this new MacBook Air!"

Excellent!  I made a date!

The following week found me back at the Apple Store.  Lexus was the name of the pleasant young woman who would offer instructions to me and the three  other questioning clients who were clustered  around the table.

"The basics!" announced Lexus.  "This week we'll go over the basics.  Then, in future classes we will get to more specific areas in which you need help."  

"But,... photos?"  I asked.  "Will we get to photos in this class? I just need to know..." 

Alas,  I was speedily informed it was not to be.  All information regarding storage or transfer or anything at all having to do with photos would be covered in a future class.

It was disappointing, but I sat through the whole hour-long class.
Following which, I signed up for the very next Part II class.
"Yes, oh, yes!" I said, when asked about enrolling.
"I've got to learn how to put photos on my blog again!"

Exiting the building, I had a new spring in my step!
Perhaps just one more week and  I'd be telling you, Dear Reader-slash-Viewer about Lexus!
And that big old backlog of photos!

***************
Well, and then......something sinister and scary came creeping and peeping around, something invisible and possibly deadly!  All future classes at the Apple store were cancelled.  The whole mall, in fact, was closed down.

***************
Are you whimpering, yet,  Reader Dear?!

***************
(to be continued...[with a bit of luck])
Just to set the record straight in the meantime::
IT'S VERY POSSIBLE I'VE DIED!**
 ( I don't want to leave you with claims that turn out to be false!).
**There are other possibilities, of course.  I'll try to let you know what develops.


***************
*Okay, thanks!

No, I have not died,

Dear One.  Neither have I fallen in a hole or gone over a cliff or taken a lengthy visit to parts unknown.  I've been right here in this spot I call home, chewing my nails (metaphorically speaking only) and procrastinating mightily (alas, in actuality) and racking up rental woes about which to regale you, Reader Dear.  I will climb back aboard the bloggity-blog train just as soon as ever I can, I assure you (in the event you are searching with any degree of eagerness for that train to come chugging along).